I know how it feels, you just can't explain in words, right?. First time you see him, you actually know him but you think he does not know your presence. Every single time you see him, your heartbeat goes faster and faster until you have butterflies in your stomach. You care about him so much but, deep inside you know that you're the only one who cares. Before you fall asleep, you think of him and dream about him. In the morning, he's the actual reason you're waking up and starting the day. When he talks to you, you listen to the every single detail and fall in love with him even more. When you're face to face, you look him in the eye and say "I love you", only inside, because you're too afraid that he will not say that 3 words back. SO, DON'T BE AFRAID, TAKE CHANCES, STEP FORWARD, DAMN GIRL, JUST SAY IT, SAY IT, SAY IT FOR CHRISSAKE! Courage is the "thing" that keeps you going, if you don't ask, the answer is always "no", if you don't try, you will always be in the same place. This thing I wrote is for the girls who lack the confidence to tell the guy she loves him. Look, for the record, if he doesn't need you, you don't need him too, if he treats you nice and cares about you, give it a shot.
As i woke up in my cosy bed, I felt an abrupt shock, because
1-I remembered that I had kilograms of homework
2-I got cold during the night when I was out
3-I felt like a truck went through me
Anyway, I have a little bit of energy because of the 2 glasses of vitamin C.
PS: I had aaaaaa llllllooootttt offf fun last night
My eyelids are literally falling, however I care enough to write here. I don't know but I am so bored from everything, everything I do has the same goal, sometimes i just don't want to have a goal, i just want to do things to actually do something, without thinking, acting recklessly. However, the ones who behave this way, unfortunately are excluded from our society. Even though, everybody denies it, every single one of us excludes or discriminates someone. I have tons and tons and tons of homework to do. I should start by maybe i dont know opening my school bag and take my books off??? Again, same goal, to get higher grades, I'm not really learning something.
2 days ago while I was wandering with a cab in the creepy streets, I spontaneously wanted to create a new personality. I closed my eyes, listening to the rain, said to myself, hey you know what, nothing's more precious than your happiness, so don't give a damn f*ck to ANYTHING that would even slightly make you sad. Right now, nothing has came across me since the new construction of my personality, let's cross our fingers and hope it never comes, besides if it really does come, I WON'T GIVE A FUCK to whom it may concern.
I'm sick and tired of everything. Sometimes I have an explosion in my head. Like something is trying to get out, I wish I knew what that was. Hope I discover someday. Anyways, today was an ordinary day at school again, no kidding, nothing INTERESTING happened, tomorrow will be the same as well, and the day after too. I just don't want to be stuck in a routine. OHH I found the most amazing quote, from Blair Waldorf even though I don't watch Gossip Girl, it's been kind of cliche lately.
Destiny is for losers
It's just a stupid excuse
to wait for things
to happen instead of
making them happen.
I really don't understand people. Why? Because they have different characters? Different thoughts? Or life is just being unfair to me as usual. Once you're close and some times you're kilometers away from them. You think, is it because of you or they're just bunch of weirdos. I don't want people to play with my feelings anymore, is it me or everyone? Feelings block my duty during the day. I do some CRAZY SPONTANEOUS things that are definitely not like me. I just have to acknowledge the fact that you don't need that person if he or she doesn't need you in their life either, that means they would just be worthless and WASTE OF TIME.
The picture exactly describes how i feel: naked. vulnerable . sad . in agony . Mad